Seeking Morpheus

"I already know the power of the Dark Side, Daddy..."

No post last week I’m afraid as work got the better of me, but in order to protect you all from viral infection through your computers, that’s probably a good thing as Gabe picked up chickenpox last week.

It was on Thursday that M rang me at work and asked me to come home to take Gabe to the doctor as she had an appointment herself. Puzzled, I got out of my meeting and got home to take Gabe in.

He was a little listless and VERY clingy, but otherwise not too bad, except for the tell-tale rash across his chest, with a couple of spots appearing on his leg and arm. He certainly didn’t appear to be lacking in energy as he tore around the waiting room playing with the toys and crashing blocks into the front window.

M hadn’t managed to get an appointment, so we were a drop in. It took an hour for us to be seen, but the Doc was very thorough in his examination, checking the rash and Gabe’s temperature, eyes, ears and mouth. This last caused a bit more consternation than the others as Gabe escaped my grasp and took a swing at the Doctor – his first punch in anger!

I was so proud.

First time having chocolate...

Less so when the confirmation came through. Definite chickenpox, albeit a mild case. A moment later, I was thoroughly deflated by the instructions – a week in isolation at home.

I knew it would hit M hard. We were due to be at a first birthday party on Saturday and were catching up with a load of friends that we hadn’t seen in ages on Sunday for a picnic, but most of all, whilst I could escape to work, M was going to be in the house with Gabe for a solid week.

She was going to go mental.

By the end of a single day, if we haven’t taken him out for a trip, he’s virtually climbing the walls, tearing up and down the house and trying to burn off his energy in any number of potentially self-harming or destructive ways, but this was a week!?!

We’ll be lucky if he doesn’t end up like a less-hairy Manny (Bill Bailey) when his ‘Dave’s Syndrome’ flared up… (check it out, I’m sure it’s online).

Manny - Dave's Syndrome (with thanks to Black Books and Channel 4)

Friday came around and I went to work. By the time I came home, M had booked another appointment for the morning because…wait for it…the chickenpox rash had gone.

"Illness can't slow me down!"

With the first birthday party on Saturday afternoon, M thought a second opinion would be worthwhile in case he didn’t have chickenpox and so was not highly contagious. Off to the Doctors’ again (this time with an appointment) to check.

Unfortunately, the second opinion came that it was likely that he had it. The options were:

1) He never had it and he had another viral infection that presented similarly;

2) He had chickenpox that was presenting strangely (i.e. without the rash); or

3) He had had chickenpox, but had beaten it in under 24 hours.

Whilst I was hoping for option 3 (which would obviously mean that Gabe had a healing power like Wolverine and I would one day be able to get him claws and an unbreakable skeleton - Correction – M says I’m not allowed, even if he does have a superhuman healing factor), the Doc says that he would guess that Option 2 was the most likely due to other symptoms (known incidental contact with chickenpox, slight fever and Thursday’s presentation).

So, here we are…day 6 of a 7 day isolation.

M has survived so far (barely) through me letting her having Saturday off and she disappeared out of the house to recharge for much of the day.

If we survive for the rest of the time, I’ll see you all next week.

Thinking about a career in the NBL

Don’t.

Just…don’t.

I’ve been procrastinating about lowering the base of Gabe’s cot for a couple of weeks after he has started pulling up and trying to climb the side of the cot. Well, last weekend, I made a plan to finally get round to it.

Unfortunately, I was about an hour too late.

A small cry came over the baby monitor and we thought it might have been a sleepy whimper and he could go back to his morning nap. He’d only been down for 30 minutes after all, but the cries became more insistent and so M went to check on him.

“Nick! He’s on the floor!” came the cry.

A cold chill came over me as I ran through the house, but aside from being a bit grumpy and clingy, Gabe seemed OK. We checked him all over for bruises, noting the slight indent in the back of his head and the growing egg on the front, and then checked his responsiveness and eye dilation before noting his big grin, willingness to play and general indignation with me shining a torch in his eyes.

Or a career as a drummer...

I looked about the room instead. I’m no Sherlock Holmes, but I think I’ve figured out what happened.

The cot had been pushed forward so that it was partly alongside the bed to have it caught in the air-con flow in the hot nights we’ve been having recently. The wet mouthprint on the mattress indicated that Gabe face-planted into the mattress from his fall from the cot. From where M first found him (crawling out from under the cot), we’ve deduced that he must have bounced back off the bed into the side of the cot and rattled between the cot and the bed to the floor, bumping his head en route.

We kept a watching brief for the rest of the day and slowly and surely the egg disappeared and everything returned to normal. Over the course of the next couple of hours though, I go in touch with my masculine side and did DIY. (Those of you who know me can stop laughing…any time you like…no…really…)

I got the Allen key out for the bolts on the cot, but after 30 minutes of less than a quarter turns due to the presence of the upright, I was feeling quite annoyed. Gabe and I went to the hardware shop and the following exchange happened:

Me: Have you got anything like an Allen Key drill bit?

Hardware Shop Manager: A what?

Me: I need an Allen key that I can put into a drill.

HSM: No, we’ve got nothing like that.

Me: Have you got anything that will cut the shank off this one? (Proffer Allen Key) 

HSM: I guess so. (Produces bolt-cutters)

Or perhaps a race-car driver (but don't tell Mummy!)

Anyway, a quick trip back to the house and I engaged a power-tool option. A reversible drill and a sawn-off Allen Key made quick work of the cot, albeit that once I’d released one of the problem bolts, I realised that it was a thread-bolt that held the thread for the corresponding screw and had smooth outsides – hence why it had taken sooooo long to try to remove by hand. Oh well – power-tools won the day and made short work of the task.

Masculinity points: +1 for the task, +1 for bolt cutters and Allen Keys, +1 for jury-rigging a solution to a problem, +5 for use of power-tools, -10 for technically not needing any of the above.

Overall loss, I’m afraid.

But anyway – lessons learnt.

1. Always check your assumptions. I knew something was up with the screw, but I should have checked harder and not leapt at the conclusion that I needed more brute force and ignorance;

2. Invent Allen Key drill bits. Ideally to sell at IKEA;

3. As soon as you notice even a potential issue with your child’s safety, address it as soon as possible. Had Gabe’s cot been in its usual place, he would have dropped the full height onto the wooden floorboards and he could have been seriously hurt.

From the Andy Warhol Collection

So, we’ve been out and about in Melbourne recently finding all sorts of cool things for babies and kids to do. Turns out, there’s quite a lot outside of the usual swings and parks, but I’m going to concentrate on three of the more unlikely venues.

Melbourne Museum

I think Gabe could take this giant grub in a fight.

OK, so hardly surprising, but the new Kid Zone on the ground floor was really fun, with play areas and interesting educational bits for the older kids. There were statues to climb on, blocks and bricks to build with, puppets to play with and lots of different activities and textures for little ones to experience.

Gabe seemed to enjoy the rest of the museum, particularly the ‘Dream’ exhibit with its calming images and soundtrack, but it was this area that he was really fascinated by, crawling in and out of wombat holes, building termite mounds (and knocking them over again) and sitting in the mirrored pyramid.

For parents (or just general visitors), the cafe is both licensed and does excellent food.

National Gallery of Victoria

The box changed colours through the spectrum…

I know, right? Strange, but the Kaleidoscope Kids Zone is a wonder of touchscreens, lights and patterns which had Gabe entranced.

The exhibits are a riot of colour and teach about mixing colours and light to give the effects that we take for granted but Gabe had never seen before really.

One area that seemed to be a favourite for all ages (and I’m still trying to work out how it was done) was two patches of floor along a corridor that lit up as you moved across them, but in different colours depending upon how fast you moved. I thought it was done with pressure, like a touchscreen, but it was lit by above – a wonderous exhibit for me too.

The State Library

“What are you taking me to today, Mummy?”

M took Gabe to the Bubs stories and singing session here today and said it was great. Lots of fun songs, play-along actions and jumping up and down.

Held in the Experi-media room with beanbags, books, video games, giant chess and loads more things to play with, it was a fun session which was timed nicely to get through two stories and some songs before the kids all get bored.

The experiences don’t end here though. Tomorrow, M is taking Gabe to his first Opera (for kids) at Melbourne Recital Centre. Called Music Play, it has a Colouring Hub, face-painting, wind chimes, hopscotch stomp, drum machines, tin can phones, a dripolator (whatever that is), and a lot, lot more.

His social life is certainly much better than mine at the moment!

Well, after a bout of ‘flu, Christmas and New Year, Gabe and I are back online and wish you all a Happy New Year. May 2012 bring you and your loved ones much health, wealth and happiness.

The annual good wishes out of the way, time to get updating. The festive period was a time of a lot of firsts for Gabe – some good, some not so much. Before I get to that though, first of all, thanks must go to Gabe’s Grandma for hosting us over Christmas, and to her dog, Wally, who was very patient with Gabe who had never seen a dog close up before and thought that the moving toy was a great thing to grab/push/pull/bite/climb on etc…

We arrived in Adelaide on 23rd December and despite being in a fine mood, that evening Gabe had the biggest vomit that I’ve ever seen outside of The Exorcist, covering M from shoulder to ankle and soaking her to the skin. I have no idea where all of his food and milk had been kept, but undoubtedly his Nanny would say that, like his father, he has hollow legs (an old saying in our family).

M simply had to walk, fully-clothed, into the shower still carrying Gabe and hose the two of them down to clear it. Rapidly after that, despite the cool(ish) shower, Gabe developed a fever that had us all up most of the night.

TIP: Electronic baby thermometers are pretty good for accurate readings – just remember that under-arm readings (the easiest to administer) will be approximately half a degree cooler than the actual body temperature, whereas rectal readings (good luck with trying that…) will be half a degree warmer than the actual body temperature.

Anyway, with the aid of hydrolytes and baby panadol (vital to have on hand, just in case), we managed the fever (with a call to the 24 hour nursing call-line at 1.45am on Christmas Eve) appropriately. It broke during the night and aside from being slightly clingy, Gabe was fine by the end of Christmas Eve.

On Christmas Day, as might have been anticipated, the main entertainment for Gabe was not the mountain of presents, but the wrapping paper and boxes - finally something that he was allowed to tear up and destroy! The main entertainment for M was different and, to my mind, slightly mean given that I’m forced to share it on this blog…

What fresh Hell is this?

Gabe was fine over the next few days, and his appetite returned so we tried letting him use a spoon to feed himself breakfast. That went well, as you can see.

OM NOM NOM!!!

Having once more thrown Gabe in the shower to get him clean and get museli out of his hair, we had a lovely time with Gabe getting to know his Uncle and one of his cousins over the remainder of our time at Grandma’s house.

We wanted to see one of M’s friends who lives on the other side of Adelaide, so we spent our last night in Adelaide at the Hilton Hotel. We had plans to meet her in the foyer of the hotel, so M and I got a drink whilst we were waiting and fed Gabe his dinner. Once that was over, Gabe was sat on M’s knee and…yup…another Exorcist moment, this time on the suade chairs of a five-star hotel.

Back upstairs in the hotel room, M had another fully-clothed shower and we got Gabe cleaned up. We eventually caught up with our friend and had a lovely evening in Glenelg by the beach.

The flight back was uneventful, but as we were collecting bags from the carousel, a plaintif cry for help from behind me indicated that M needed help. I noticed that Gabe was distressed and went over to help mop up the mess that had spilt onto M’s shorts and leg – it was only then that I noticed that it wasn’t a smaller posit, but an overflowing nappy explosion that had caused the issue - and M copped all three incidents.

Well, bad things do come in threes.

Since we’ve been back in Melbourne, fortunately, we’ve had no more incidents like that and the doctor has given Gabe a full check up and he’s fine now.

Back on the subject of firsts, it was Gabe’s first Christmas, and he also had his first New Year – although the entirety of our household decided to value sleep over tradition and as a result, for the first time in more than 30 years, I was asleep at midnight. The weather was very hot here, about 40 degrees (another first for Gabe who spent pretty much the whole time naked except for his nappy) and hogging the air-conditioning.

Anyway – 2012 is Gabe’s second year, and his first birthday is just around the corner. I’m looking forward to seeing more firsts – he’s almost walking and talking, so his first steps and words will make 2012 an enchanting and special year for us all on their own.

Happy New Year to you all!

Mmmm - Milk!

Last week, I wrote about the fact that I never wanted Gabe’s curiosity and adventurous spirit to go away and I stand by that, I’m just no longer sure that I’ll survive to see much more of it.

In a form of instant Karmic retribution, the last week has been…well, trying.

Partially, it’s down to the fact that I’ve been ill this week – a combination of pharyngitis and sinusitis that has left me feeling tired, run-down and achy. Gabe has been thoroughly entertained though, as the sound of me blowing my nose has him in stitches. For those that care, I’m on anti-biotics and will be back at work tomorrow.

However, even if I had not been ill, I’m not sure that I could have kept up with him. Partially, it’s because I’ve had an extra day and a half with him around due to not being at work (me, not Gabe) and partially, it’s just because his crawling, climbing and standing are now getting more and more developed, and he’s also getting stronger.

M caught him doing a chin-up on his bookshelf, actually lifting himself off the ground. He’s moving boxes to climb on and reach higher shelves. He’s moved the guard we’ve got over the fireplace (fortunately, we don’t use the fireplace, but still) and he’s able to drag his toy-box out of the way in order to get to the DVD shelves that it used to block.

Have masher. Must mash!

Once I’m feeling up to it, I’m going to have to dismantle the cot and lower the base to the lowest setting, because we’ve found him trying to climb out, and after the bookshelf incident, he might actually make it.

He’s fast too – now crawling, we have no guarantees that when we put him down he’ll stay in the same place for more than 0.5 of a second. He’s twisting and turning so much that the only way to change a nappy without a nervous breakdown is to have one of us pin him down whilst the other does the dirty work (pun intended – and no, a toy does not distract him anymore).

Perhaps my worst idea so far - a crate full of balls...

Unfortunately, his knowledge of the frailty of humanity (particularly his father) has not advanced so much. As a result, he is unaware about how hard he can kick, pinch and bite. This last is the most testing at the moment, as he is seeking to soothe his gums and explore the world around him through biting – a common thing, I am told (everything goes into the mouth) – which means biting M and I.

Currently, we’re hoping that a course of a very firm “No!”, putting him down and turning away from him for a minute will indicate our displeasure to him. It seems to be working, but it’s slow going.

So, I turn to you, loyal readers. Any suggestions for taming a biting baby?